This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
