"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize