We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
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