Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
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Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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