I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
