Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
