it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Randomize