he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
