Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
