you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
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