Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Is Oprah even human
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize