Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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