Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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