I'm drive I can fine osifer
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize