i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
operation harelip BJ is a go
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
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i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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