i may or may not be watching the land before time
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
