Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
