That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
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