id be glad to
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
i now understand why vodka
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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