tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
