these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
