lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Randomize
