Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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