I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
If I die, sorry about rent.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
