If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Randomize
