that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
they're like a gay fantastic four
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
