6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
