Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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