We're like a lot better than the average bears
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
