How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
