Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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