i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
