do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
