the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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