My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize