well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
