like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
