I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
You're a waste of cheezeits
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Randomize
