Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
