awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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