She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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