Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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