Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Man, jail baloney is awful.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
