wrigley field is MILF paradise
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
i just had sex bonerless
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
