i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
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