Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
