Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Randomize
