you mean i was at the winter classic?
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
