He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
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So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
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I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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