I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
So vagazzling was a success
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
wow bdsm is so cute
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize